Friday, October 30, 2015

The Adventures of Feather Man ... by Sam

There was once a feather, who wanted to be more than what he was. A feather. So after years of training he came out of the pillow and set off to travel the world (the house). Of course once he got out he was faced with problems, but one thing he did not know was that he was actually royalty and his relative was the King of all Feathers in Port Melbourne. He was going to outer space (outside) and was so close to making it but he was sucked up by the vacuum...

Feather man was trapped in the vacuum cleaner... "How do I get out of here?" he thought. He looked around, there was more than one feather in this vacuum cleaner, it was like a refugee camp but worse, a lot worse. Feather man was not going to give up that easily so he got all the feathers' attention and gave an inspirational speech. "Are you guys just going to wait here for someone to get you out? Or are you going to get out and live your life?" He waited for a moment and then somebody shouted "We were waiting for someone like you". The crowd nodded. "Argh whatever!" feather man said as he started climbing up the vacuum tube. When he was finally out he jumped and started gliding for about 3 seconds and then a dog ate him... yep a dog...and there was also a cat prowling behind him.

Inside the dog's belly, feather man was sitting down and then he stood up angrily and shouted to himself, "OH COME ON REALLY... first the vacuum and now this". He looked around and saw two feathers playing poker. He took a seat and asked curiously "How long have you been here?" the two feathers didn't look up for 5 whole minutes. When they did one said gloomily "Ten years I reckon... and by the way the dog's name is Buster, he is an English Staffy". Feather man looked up and said, "I've heard horror stories about that dog! Why haven't you left? You could just go down the hatch..." the feathers looked at feather man very alarmed and both shouted "NO!!" Feather man understood why they said that, but he knew he had to do it, so he suffered the horror and was out.

Feather man needed to shower. He glided for several days meeting new friends along the way. Finally he came to the great shower. He needed to turn the tap on, but he wasn't strong enough. Suddenly he heard a low growl. Feather man spun around to see Buster outside the shower ready to attack! Feather man had an idea - if he could get Buster to jump at the shower tap and turn it on he would have his shower. When Buster attacked he failed badly, he just ran with a surprising rhythm and speed and slammed right into the shower door. Man, that fat dog could run, he was like a lightening bolt. Feather man had been doing a lot of intense training and jumped right over Buster like a calm relaxed angel (an angel dripping with sweat). Buster came at him again and feather man was struck down to the ground and hard. He pulled out his trusty boomerang, throwing it at the shower tap it turned on - toe biting cold water slammed down on Buster and that fat dog was out. Feather man caught his boomerang and laughed to himself as nice cold water poured down on him. He got out of the shower and saw a little (massive to him) curious drooling 3 year old staring down at him. "OH NO"

He had a small head start and was sprinting with the toddler right behind him. The toddler had a half-eaten, licked chocolate cupcake in his hand. For the toddler this was a playful game but for feather man this was a matter of life or death. He made it into the toddler’s room and hid under the bed. He spied a motorbike and a hot wheels track and hopped onto the motorbike and rocketed down the track. The toddler did not have a clue what was going on, but that didn't stop him from racing after the motorbike. Feather man was near the end of the track and skidded to a halt. He had escaped the toddler but not the walls and crashed right into one while he was looking back and laughing.

Feather man hopped out of the crashed car. Needing supplies he went back into the kids’ room and found military clothes his size and a remote control plane that shot little pellets. He was ready! His first target was the shower and he fired heaps of bullets. The shower recovered quickly and fired the coldest water it had. Feather man jumped out of the plane hitting the tap off (don't ask me how it turned on in the first place) and the shower fell to the ground. Next was the toddler. He was easy, just fire a few pellets and he was off crying and running away. Next, the vacuum cleaner. He jumped out and was sucked in, but that was his plan! Inside he saw the other feathers were still there. "Come on my brothers we can destroy this!” This time he heard a massive cheer and they all got out of the vacuum and attacked it except some stupid feather named Hiccup went to the front and tried to tame it. He got sucked in but crashed the vacuum. After the battle the feathers returned home (apart from that guy called Hiccup), only the dog and feather man were left standing. Feather man took off his military clothes and looked like a plain old feather. Buster ran at him and feather man knew it was the end. He would never start his new journey and so he closed his eyes and waited but nothing happened. He opened his eyes to get a nice warm lick from Buster. Buster had let feather man go! He hugged the dog and floated out the door and into space (the world).

Disclaimer: Nothing was harmed in this story apart from some feather who crashed a plane into a vacuum cleaner.

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